It hurts to grow up...

Recently, when my parents were on vacation, Matt, Luke & I went to their house one evening to water and tend to their garden.  I've been to their house probably 100 times since I moved out 7+ years ago but there is something about being there without the rest of the family that makes me reflect upon the 20 years I lived there.

I was already feeling rather nostalgic due to my upcoming birthday and going through all my boxes in the basement.  It's little things like the way the cereal cupboard smells the same or the sound the screen door makes when it shuts.  I could almost see my child self running around the backyard in a memory that epitomizes childhood summers to me.  Our climbing tree is still there, just missing some branches.  The swing set is the same it's been literally my whole life (my Dad finished building it the day before I was born and took it with them when they moved 3 years later). 

first day of Country Christian Homeschool, August 1995

The looks of much of the house has changed by the feeling has not.  The room I still think of as "mine" has had a few occupants since I went to college and is now a guest room.  But in my head it will always be "my" room.  The bathroom us 6 girls shared for so many years now only has 1 daily occupant.  No more signing up for shower times (for those wondering how 4 teenage girls could share 1 bathroom). 

my favorite picture of the "original 8"

Being where essentially my whole childhood took place made me reflect on those first 18 years of my life.  It goes so incredibly fast.  So fast.  I had a near perfect childhood.  Perfect.  Loving parents, best friends in my sisters.  We played outside in the spring/summer/fall and had all sorts of inside games for the winter.  We never had a gaming system (until my parents bought a Wii a few years ago) and didn't watch much tv.  We played together.  Legos, Playmobil, Barbies, Wilderness sisters, boat, shops, and mixer. =) It's the kind of imaginative childhood I hope we can give to Luke. 

I don't know how those years are so far behind me already.  I love love love Matt, Luke, and the life I have now.  But it does make me sad that, somehow, my childhood is long gone.  I miss living in that house with my parents and 5 sisters.  I miss the family dinners where there were twice the conversations as people at any given time.  I miss being able to just walk down the hall for long talks with my sisters.  I miss getting ready for bed with 3 of us in the bathroom at once.  I miss those carefree days and all the time we had just being together. 

Later, when you're grown up, you realize you never really get to hang out with your family. You pretty much have only eighteen years to spend with them full time, and that's it. - Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

 
What this really makes me realize is how short and precious life is.  And to enjoy where I am at life right now.  I know Luke will be walking, talking, and running around before we know it.  Time is a constant and will keep moving at the same pace it always has.  All we can do is to make the most of the time we have, and to treasure where we are in life RIGHT NOW.  At some point what we have right now will just be the good old days we look back on.  You don't get a do over, this is it. 

And to my family...I love you guys.  Thank you for being such a incredibly wonderful part of my life.  xoxo