We talk often of our desire for another kid (or two, or three, although preferably not three at once...) and it was Luke's wish every time he blew out his birthday candles. He so desperately wants to be a big brother.
But while we are (somewhat) impatiently waiting for that baby, I often think about the things that will change when we have an infant in the house again.
I'll miss all the one-on-one time I have with Luke.
I'll miss sleeping through the night.
I'll miss our family bike rides.
I'll miss our family jet ski rides.
I'll miss quiet time.
I'll miss the ease of just having a preschooler.
I'll miss only having to wash sheets on a regular schedule, not because they were peed or puked on.
I'll miss the ease of the schedule we have right now.
Luke is about as easy as a kid can get right now. He's fully (knock on wood) potty trained. We are on no schedule which means he frequently sleeps past 8:30 and that's fine because we have nowhere to be early most mornings. He feeds himself, takes himself to the bathroom (although, not public ones yet), can pick up his own toys, and entertain himself. We have less than 18 months before he's in school and while he's super excited about that, I'll definitely be mourning not having my buddy around all day...and being on a school schedule (you have no idea how much I am dreading that. It's the main reason homeschooling is so appealing to me.)
So we are at a pretty great stage right now but, I know, throwing an infant back into the mix will change everything. Maybe not as big of a shift as becoming first time parents (we'll feel a little more confident this time around, right?) but still, a big shift.
It's not often Luke needs us in the middle of the night.
We can pick up and go on a spur of the moment ski trip (like we did a few weeks ago).
The whole family can ride our bikes downtown (like we did a few weeks ago and will continue to do frequently as the weather improves).
Our lake trips will greatly change with the addition of a baby. (The only con in the twins column: even once the babies would be big enough, we couldn't fit the whole family on the jet ski together...)
We are long past that stage where we have to worry about what a baby/toddler could pick up and put in their mouths.
So while we continue our wait of undetermined length, it's helpful to remember all the things that will change and appreciate where we are in life right now. There is a lot of goodness. Maybe not the goodness we were expecting or hoping for at this stage in our lives, but a lot of goodness, nonetheless.
I wouldn't trade Luke for all the babies we expected to have by now and I know I'll feel the same once the next one comes along. But for now, it's helpful to appreciate where we are, what we have, the freedom we have with just one, pretty easy to take wherever we go kid. It's not the life we may have imagined right now, but it's pretty wonderful all the same.
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