My husband and I were talking this morning and I remarked that I've had an iPhone for 7½ years and he was shocked that it had been that long. Now almost every adult I know (and most teens) have a smart phone even though it doesn't seem all that long ago that it was crazy to carry around a computer in our pockets all day.
(We were just telling Luke last night about how the computers at our grade schools didn't even have color screens, it's crazy how fast things have advanced!)
Technology has changed a lot in my lifetime and even just in the time we've been married. I've written here multiple times, even in the past few weeks, about how I'm trying to manage and reduce the time I spend on social media.
So of course I wanted to read this book:
Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World by Cal Newport.
First it made me feel pretty cocky because the book uses research to back up most of what I was saying about reducing time spent on social media.
Then I started to wonder if I could do the 30 day technology detox he suggests.
By the end of the book I was torn between thinking I am doing enough to limit my time but also wanting to do a detox to see if I would feel better. (The verdict is still out.)
Here's the thing: the people behind all the social media companies that keep sucking up our time, they are VERY motivated to get us to spend as much time there as possible. The more time we spend, the more money they make. They want you to go down rabbit trails and feel the need to open the apps multiple times a day.
According to this book, Facebook makes ~88% of their ad income from the phone app. Instagram stories were introduced solely as a way to get people to spend more time on it (and I can definitely tell that's true from my own usage.)
The apps are likened to slot machines except we all carry them around all day and instead of winning money (because it's certainly not us making money from these) you "win" likes and followers and hearts and views. Facebook changed their notification icon at the top of the screen to red and all of a sudden everyone was clicking on it and spend more time on the site. The companies are smart and they know they have millions addicted.
It was fascinating to read a bit behind of the scenes of how these companies have sucked us in. I don't like to feel like anyone is manipulating me and I like thinking I'm beating "the system". And so it also empowered me to stop lining their pockets.
I feel justified in carrying my phone around all day because I want Luke's school to be able to get a hold of me (number of times they have called in his ~120 days of school: 0). I want Matt to be able to get a hold of me (partially because I always want to be able to get a hold of him.) And I swear every time I leave my phone downstairs when I go get Sam from a nap, he's doing something super cute and I wish I had my phone with me (heaven forbid a day of a life not be over documented).
But there are plenty of hours in the afternoon and evenings, when all 4 of us are home, that I could put my phone upstairs and go hours without it. Yet, I still, almost always, have it within 5 feet.
It's really good for all of us to have some peace and quiet. Time to actually think, for no inputs to our brains. I LOVE nap and/or quiet time but it's not very restful for me to spend the whole time I don't have a kid with me on my phone or computer. The book talks about how important this sort of thinking, quiet time has been to many important people. Sure, easy for Abraham Lincoln to do, there was very little technology in his time, he just had a war between states to worry about.
It's not just about spending less time on social media but also spending time in quiet, away from technology. Some time thinking, in fresh air, or just with a book (we all know what my preferred is). There are a lot of pluses to social media and I for one am not giving them all up. But I do think it's very important to be conscious of how we use them and how much we are using them. It's been a focus of mine for years and something I am even more motivated to do after reading this book.
The social media companies aren't going anywhere and more will always be popping up. It's up to us to make sure we do have that quiet in the day, that we are having real conversations with real people in front of us (or over the phone or Facetime, because distance can be hard). That we aren't just communicating with people via text or Instagram but that we really are making face to face (or voice to voice) connections. We shouldn't be connected to our phones every minute of the day (And I say that with my own about 3 inches away.)
Even if you feel fine about the time you spend on your phone and on social media, it is certainly worthwhile to learn more about how these companies try to manipulate us and take a bunch of our time. To be more aware of how much time you are spending on these things and how you are using them. Do they actually provide all the benefits we like to think they do?
This book gave me a lot to think about. It further emphasized how important it is to limit time spent on these sites and just on my phone in general. It made me want to have more real quiet in my day. And it inspired me to reach out and set-up real, face to face get togethers with some people instead of just communicating over text. It's near impossible to live our lives without screens now but it's certainly worthwhile to reduce our time on them and to improve the rest of our lives away from them. I highly recommend this book to everyone with a smart phone. I feel much better about my screen time already.
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